“I MEAN, THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IN LESS THAN A MONTH....

“I MEAN, THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IN LESS THAN A MONTH....:

“I MEAN, THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IN LESS THAN A MONTH. YOU’RE PROBABLY AS SICK OF READING THESE FLIERS AS I AM OF WRITING THEM. YOU KNOW WHAT? NOW THAT I’M WRITING THIS ALL OUT? FUCK THIS CAT. ‘MESSAGE RECEIVED,’ KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING? SO IF YOU’RE MY LOST CAT, AND YOU’RE READING THIS FLIER, I GET IT. YOU DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITH ME. MAYBE IT’S MY FAULT. MAYBE YOU DIDN’T LIKE THE DRY FOOD OR MAYBE I WASN’T IMPRESSED ENOUGH BY YOUR ABILITY TO READ. I’M SORRY. LET US PART AS FRIENDS. ANYONE ELSE READING THIS, SORRY TO WASTE YOUR TIME. I SHOULD NOT HAVE CONTINUED TO TYPE UP THIS INTERNAL MONOLOGUE, ATTACH A PHOTO, PRINT MULTIPLE COPIES, AND POST THEM THROUGHOUT THE NEIGHBORHOOD. PLEASE TEAR THIS DOWN AND DISPOSE OF IT IN AN APPROPRIATE RECYCLING RECEPTACLE. IF YOU JUST THROW IT IN A REGULAR TRASH CAN, I HOPE YOU WILL SUBSEQUENTLY APOLOGIZE TO A TREE. AND IF YOU KNOW A TREE THAT SPEAKS ENGLISH, DON’T TAKE IT FOR GRANTED! LET THAT TALKING TREE KNOW THAT YOU ARE IMPRESSED!”